There's no Welcome Committee here

But there probably should be.

I’ve been thinking about this for a while now but the necessity of this conversation has been made increasingly clear over these last months. We are in a uniquely galvanizing time right now for many. And for others, this is a time of awakening. We were in a time like this in 2020, we were in another in 2015. And as the wheels continue to fall off of this terror-ride we call end-stage capitalism, these moments will come more frequently, and more fiercely, in the future.

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash. Description: a photograph of a welcome sign hanging from a wood post. it reads “Welcome please come in.”

And as we buckle up for this journey that we absolutely didn’t ask to be on, we - those of us who have perhaps seen this coming, or have been (due to our marginalized identities) already living the horrors to come for others for a while now - have to talk about how we will deal with those who are just now figuring out that this shit sucks and that somebody should do something about it.

For those with little patience for those who are just now realizing that a genocide in Palestine is happening and has been happening for a very long time, and that it is…bad…or are just now googling “settler colonialism” to try to figure out what it might mean after spending a lot of time insisting that it doesn’t exist, I hear you. As a Black woman, having white people come up to me to tell me how stunned and outraged they were to discover that racism still existed in 2020 - as if we’d been keeping it a secret - and then staring at me expecting the commiseration that they were sure would come next was definitely the cherry on top of the shit sundae that was that gawdawful year.

I don’t want to hang out with people while they process their newfound knowledge of the lived reality of populations of color. I really don’t. It’s annoying and I’m kinda busy trying to survive this all, you know?

And this is totally understandable of me to feel, if I may say so myself. But somebody has to welcome latecomers in. Because if we don’t they either leave, or try to figure it all out on their own and well, neither often end up with outcomes that we like. And the truth is, the “other side” here has their own welcome system down to a science. They excel at turning the frustrations and confusions of uniformed folks and nurturing it into full-blown hatred and bigotry in just a few simple steps. But for any who are experimenting with questioning our systems or trying to wrap their heads around their privilege or even the concept of privilege, they are often met with exasperation at best, and outright dismissal or hostility at worst.

Look. I don’t have all the answers here. And please don’t send every person starting to realize that racism exists to my inbox (it already happens with annoying frequency). But if we’re going to win these battles against systemic oppression and violence, we have to find a way to get people from questioning to action as quickly and efficiently as possible.

This is work that I think about on an organizational level. There are some amazing organizations that work to empower youth to find their place in movement work. And there are amazing spaces that work to empower and organize communities most impacted by systemic oppression. But what I’m talking about are people with who often have a lot of privilege with regard to the issue at hand. Those not targeted by the particular oppression being discussed. Those who may have never had to consider oppression in any real way before. Those who maybe got to become grown-ass adults before they realized that the problem even existed. Where do these people belong and I sweatergawd don’t you dare say another book club. These are active spaces that I envision community organizations, schools, and other organized parties committed to addressing social issues hold, are trying to hold, or should be holding. And I am sure that there are some places that are trying to do this work. But not only are there not enough to get people out of my DMs, we also haven’t normalized any kind of discussion or idea about this privileged-adult pathway to awareness. And as we look at how we interact with each other individually and collectively, I think we all can afford to think about how we welcome people into movement and social justice work with more care. So here are some things that I’m thinking about right now.

1. We need to remember that we all didn’t know until we knew. Some of us had to learn really, painfully early in life. Some of us learned later. All of us a still learning. And all of us are devastatingly ignorant of somebody else’s oppression - oppression that we are likely contributing to. Babies do not have political ideologies. But a lot of people act like they came out of the womb knowing all they know now. A lot of people act like they’ve never contributed to systemic harm. And a lot of people will treat those who are newer in their journeys with a contempt that reflects their own hidden shame at their own past - and perhaps present - complicity in systemic oppression. None of this is helpful. It sends a message to others who are just now starting to get it that they are beyond redemption. That something is fundamentally wrong with them for not knowing sooner. That perhaps they are incapable of ever getting it right. And for those showing contempt, that defensiveness will prevent you from seeing the ways in which you are continuing to contribute to harm today.

2. But we’re also responsible for the harm we’ve caused, ignorant or not. I’ve said this so many times. We have to hold two truths at once when reconciling with systemic harm that we have contributed to: It happens all the time, and It’s not okay. You didn’t invent harm. You were exploited by very powerful systems into contributing to harm of others and ultimately, harm of yourself. This is what these systems were designed to do. Nobody is immune from this and everybody has contributed to systemic harm in one way or the other. So no, you aren’t a monster. But also, you’ve hurt people. And you must be accountable to that, as we also work to hold systems accountable for designing and compelling the harm. Your shame or guilt doesn’t fix the harm. Only accountability can, and even then, it may only be able to do so much. And we’re all going to have to find a way to live with that and do the work anyway.

3. Knowing and Doing are two separate things. It is important that we are aware of how systemic oppression works and how we have been manipulated and exploited by it. But, that knowledge itself doesn’t really do anything. And it’s quite easy to feel like the emotional effort of becoming aware is having an impact on the world, because it’s having quite the impact on you. But without action it’s kinda like running in place. It’s hard and exhausting and you may well feel changed by it, but you aren’t actually going anywhere.

4. We need more spaces designed for people who are beginning to question the indoctrination of our exploitative systems. It can’t just be the comments section of my Instagram posts. Seriously though, right now people are scouring social media for more information on Palestine, on settler colonialism, on apartheid and more. And social media is a great place to build initial awareness - which is why there are so many efforts to censor what is said there. But channeling that budding awareness into deeper conversation and education, and being able to address questions that may seem simplistic or even offensive to those who have been doing this work or just struggling to survive under the oppression being discussed is not done well in comment sections. People who are just beginning to do the very hard work of breaking free from this massive indoctrination project need to know that they aren’t alone, that their questions are welcome, that their confusion and anger and grief is normal. And they need responsible, informed, and very patient people to be answering their questions without the unhelpful contributions of bots and trolls.

5. The job of creating these spaces shouldn’t be placed on the shoulders of those most harmed by the past ignorance of those joining the spaces. I don’t know how many times I’ve been told that I have drop everything to entertain questions about racism on-demand - questions that are often quite racist or harmful to me on their own - and I have to do it with a smile, lest I turn away a “potential ally.” Um, absolutely not. I did not sign up for that, and the expectation that I would nanny someone through their budding awareness of my own oppression is racist in itself. This is a good job for well-versed white people to volunteer for (guided by compensated BIPOC), or for consenting BIPOC to be paid to do.

6. These spaces need to address the fear, grief, and isolation that often comes with budding awareness. Most people new to all this spent a lot of time believing what they were told to believe, by people they love and who say they love them, or by systems that they had trusted. Recognizing the harm that came from a place that you thought was full of love or trust, that really hurts. And that pain is real. Just because some of us never had the luxury of being able to trust these systems, doesn’t mean that others don’t have real grief at the loss of what we never had. And that grief has to be processed if we want people to be able to do effective work. Further, moving away from beliefs that your friends or family hold often causes painful ruptures. People need support through that transition and that support should come from others who are going through the same thing, and people who have come through on the other side and have been able to find new community on the side of justice. But importantly, those who would be harmed by these discussions, or have been harmed by those who are just now trying to have these discussions, really don’t need to be in that room unless they want to be. The safety of those primarily impacted needs to be prioritized in every step of this work.

7. These spaces need to not only educate on issues, but continue to enlighten people on how to break away from harm, how to address harm they have caused, and how to be accountable to those harmed without weaponizing privilege and fragility. This isn’t about a space to coddle people to enlightenment and just babysitting them until they are experts before we ask them to do anything of tangible effect - it’s about believing that people can handle the truth about oppression and their participation in it and can work to fight that oppression while they learn, and showing them that they can by clearly stating the expectation that they will.

8. We need to define clear action for people who want to do something that takes into consideration a person’s knowledge, experience, skills, and privilege. Who should be on the frontlines? Who should be sending money? Who should be talking to their racist coworkers or community members, and what should they be saying? Who should be calling representatives? Who should be gathering supplies? Who should be showing up at school board meetings and should they be making demands or supporting others who are? Every day I get messages from people asking “What should I do?” “Should I go to a protest?” “Am I welcome at this protest?” “Is this organization trusted to send money to?” “Do you know what boycotts I should join?” “Should I join a boycott?” “Is there a website that will tell me what to do?” And it doesn’t matter that I’m not an organizer and really not the best person to give these answers outside of what I myself am doing in my local area with my own particular knowledge and privilege. I’m someone on the internet and I know more than they do and so many people really don’t know who else to ask, so I’m the one who gets asked. Or somebody else they follow online is. And when people don’t get a satisfactory answer they default to whatever is easiest - which is often nothing at all. And the blame for why people don’t know where to get this information can really be spread around.

9. This work of creating more organized space for privileged people to come into this work cannot take resources from front-line organizing or from those primarily impacted by oppression. We already give a lot of time, energy, and money to people who are privileged enough to have gotten well into adulthood before becoming aware of systemic oppression. And those resources are rarely well spent and almost always come at the expense of those already overburdened by the very oppression people say they are trying to address. So we have to be intentional, and the work cannot be a distraction from the important, now stuff, that can make the most impact for our most affected communities.

10. We all have, to some degree, a place in this work of welcoming. So, I’m not going to be the person you should call to process your feelings about discovering that racism exists and that you’ve been racist. And trust me: you don’t want me to be. But I am trying to be as open as possible in my own journey around the ableism that I absolutely still struggle to identify within myself and what my accountability for the harm of that ableism looks like. And the billion other ways in which I’ve caused harm that I haven’t discovered yet, but hopefully will. And I’ve been aided in these struggles by people who have been patient, kind and firm with me along the way. And I owe it to them and their generous efforts to do the same for others, especially for systemic oppressions that I am not a primary target of. Even just being publicly accountable is important to showing people that we can all address harm that we’ve caused and it won’t kill us, and it doesn’t mean that we’ll be cast out to the wilderness forever, and it doesn’t mean that we’re horrible monsters because we caused harm in the first place. Just talking about the journey your on invites others to join you.

Okay, this is a lot more thoughts than I thought I was going to lay out in one post. But I’d love y’all’s feedback here. What do you think of the above? What sits right with you? What doesn’t? What do you think you can do to help build this pipeline to justice? What do you know is already being done along these lines in your community that we can support, that people can join, or that can serve as inspiration for others? Leave your thoughts in the comments!